WOMEN ISSUES IN THE MONTH OF RAMADAN PART 2

As a follow up to the part 1, Women Issues in the month of Ramadan. Let us today examine the followings matters that have to do with women issues in Ramadan.

NULLIFIERS OF FASTING.

THINGS THAT ARE NOT PERMITTTED FOR A WOMAN IN HER FASTING.

ISSUES THAT DO NOT HAVE EFFECTS ON YOUR FASTING AS A WOMAN.

NULLIFIERS OF FASTING:

1. Sex: day time in the Ramadan. the fasting is nullified.
2. Discharges of sperms through excessive kisses or contacts with your husband/wife (though you can hug and kiss lightly) No
problem with kisses and hugging only be sure you do not arouse your feelings.
3. Eating and drinking
4. Nutrient injections to keep you strong (DRIPS)
5. Deliberate vomiting. But uncontrollable vomiting does not nullify fasting
7. Menstruations or the discharges of blood during or before delivering or before giving birth.

THINGS THAT ARE NOT PERMITTED FOR A WOMAN WHEN FASTING ESPECIAL IN THE MONTH OF RAMADAN. (مكروهات الصيام)

Undesirable issues in fasting do not actually nullify your fasting, but it is recommended, that you do not burden yourself with fasting when you are in one of those situations. And they are:

1.When sick: The sick is not permitted to fast. Especial if the sickness weakens your body.

2.When on journey. Its recommended that, you do not fast when on journey.

3.During pregnancy: Pregnant women are supposed to abstain from fasting. Islam has exempted them temporary from fasting, due to what they go through.

4.Toothpaste: Though it does not nullify your fasting, but cautions must be observed here because of its pungent taste.
5.Constant gathering of saliva in the mouth and swallowing it. (Not a good behavior)

6.Too much water in the mouth during ablution for gargling or inhaling and exhaling.

7.Anti-Menses pills: Do not use pills that prevents you from your usual menses because of fasting or any other IBADAT. It does not nullify your fasting, but not recommended.

ISSUES THAT DO NOT HAVE EFFECTS ON YOUR FASTING:

1.The use of lips sticks or creams to prevent lips dryness

2.taking blood samples for medical reasons.

3.Women, who bleed abnormally beyond their period days, must fast even if they continue to bleed outside their normal menstrual days.

4.The use of performs and other body fragrance has nor any effects on your fasting.

5.Chewing sticks for a short period especial during ablutions do not have any effects on your fasting.

6.KOHL (KWALLI) for eyelids and other make up kids for women do not have any bearing on your fasting. Any exterior body substance for beautification does not have effect on your fasting.

7.Injections for medical reasons do not have effect on your fasting.

8.Light kisses between you and your husband without the exchange of saliva. And without exciting each other has no bearing on your fast. RASULULLAH used to kiss his wives s when fasting and when going out for prayers sometimes.

9.Asthmatic patient can use their mouth or throat spray while fasting. No problem with that.

10.A woman can taste the food she prepares lightly and without swallowing it to see if the ingredients she puts are ok. No problem with that even when fasting.

11.You can delay Janaba bathing after legal sex or after menstruations until sun rises no problem with that. Your fasting is valid. (JANABA does not have effects on fasting

12.Eye drops and Ear drops do not nullify fasting. Only nose drops have effects, cautions must be
observed here.

13. Bleeding of a pregnant woman does not have effects on her fasting. If its not a labour sign

14.Day dreams having sex does not have effects on your fasting.

15.If you forget and eat or drink something, and you suddenly remember that you are fasting, stop it immediately and continue with your fasting. No problem with that.

16. Food items or money from your boy friend during the Ramadan, though do not have effects on your fasting, but avoiding it is the best.(because of the illegal relationship between you and the man). ALLAH does not accept illegal things.

WHAT TO DO IF YOUR SENSELESS HUSBAND WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU DAY TIME IN THE RAMDAN,

Under no circumstances shall you allow your husband to have sex with you, day time in the Month of RAMADAN. If he forces and have sex with you against your will. Your fasting is valid. But he must offer some (KAFFARAT الكفارة) or Expiatory as a punishment for violating the sacredness of the holy month.

And the EXPIATORIES or kaffarat for having sex day time in the RAMADAN are:

1.Freeing of a slave. (Of course now there are no slaves so this option cannot be met)
2.If you can’t get a slave to free, then you must fast 2 months continuously without breaking unless with an acceptable tangible reason.
3. And if you can’t fast 2 months continuously, then you feed 60 needy or poor people.

SOME IMORTANT INFORMATIONS ABOUT THE RAMADAN:

1.The old must not fast. The old age people are exempted from fasting. They only need to feed a poor person daily.

2.If a non-Muslim lady becomes a Muslimah day time in the Ramadan, she has to abstain from eating in the public for that day, but she doesn't have to pay that day or any missing days.

3.It is well recommended that a woman should not fast when travelling especial if there is any possibilities of fatigues in the journey. Fasting while on journey is not a recommended habit. Its better you don’t fast.

4. If a young girl sees her menses for the first time day time in the Ramadan, she must abstain from food, though she will not pay for that day and the previous days, But fasting has become obligations on her from that day.

With this we come to an end to an for the Ramadan lectures. Next will be "Tafseer" of some verses and chapters.

May ALLAH swt make our fasting and Ibadah perfect. And may ALLAH swt reward our mothers, wives, daughters, sisters and all women who always work tirelessly to prepare food for us in every month of Ramadan. Aameen.

Every woman who can read the Holy Quran must try to read it many times in this blessed month.

RAMADAN FOR ONLY WOMEN: WOMEN ISSUES IN THE MONTH OF RAMADAN. (PART 1)

WHEN A WOMAN MUST START TO FAST IN ISLAM?
IN WHAT SITUATIONS IS SHE EXEMPTED FROM FASTING?
MENSTRUATIONS AND PREGNANCY IN RAMADAN. WHAT A WOMAN MUST DO?

As a follow up to my series of messages on fasting in Ramadan and its related issues. I am in this and in the coming series going to talk about women issues in the month of Ramadan. The laws, provisions and prohibitions on women in Ramadan.

Please, take your time and read them carefully. Women issues and are very difficult when in Islam and its ritual. We only try our best to explain some of them to you.

Women and men are equal in Islam and are equally rewarded in any IBADAT. The Holy Quran says:

“فَٱسۡتَجَابَ لَهُمۡ رَبُّهُمۡ أَنِّى لَآ أُضِيعُ عَمَلَ عَـٰمِلٍ۬ مِّنكُم مِّن ذَكَرٍ أَوۡ أُنثَىٰ‌ۖ بَعۡضُكُم مِّنۢ بَعۡضٍ۬”

And their LORD answered their SUPPLICATIONS, never shall I render useless the deeds of you, male or female your one member from one another (3:195)

Fasting or to fast is one of the 5 pillars or principles of Islam. Islam in its obligations and rewards does not differentiate between man and woman in all the IBADATS except where it relieves some demands on women due to some natural physical changes that occur to them sometimes. Aside that, a female and a male are both equal in the face Islam.

THE Holy Quran again: “وَٱلصَّـٰٓٮِٕمِينَ وَٱلصَّـٰٓٮِٕمَـٰتِ”
And the fasting men and fasting women (33:35)

These are only to tell you that men and women are equal in all the “Ibadats” in Islam.

Now to the main topic about women issues and conditions in the month of Ramadan.

1. WHAT IS FASTING IN ISLAM? AND WHO MUST FAST?

Fasting is defined as, the abstinence of food, drinks, sex and vulgar speeches from the sun rise to the sun set with “NIYAT” or intentions, every night in the month of RAMADAN. Fasting in the Ramadan, is an obligation on every Muslim or Muslimat who attained the age of adulthood (puberty), sane (MENTALLY FIT), resident (not a Traveler) and capable. (Free from sickness or menses).

2. HOW DO WE DETERMINE IF A GIRL HAS REACHED ADULTHOOOD (PUBERTY) IN ISLAM?

Islam is a RELIGION of rules and regulations. You cannot just do things as you want to. Some rules and conditions must be met first.

A woman is considered an adult with one of the following occurs in her.

1. Attaining the age of 15years.
2. The appearance or the growing of rough and coarse hair around the vagina.
3. Whenever a known sperms (semen) is found in her (by dreams or other means)
4. And when she starts to get her menses or she becomes
Pregnant.

If any of these conditions are found in a girl she is considered an adult. Fasting in the month of RAMADAN and other IBADATS become compulsory on her. It is therefore incumbent on her parents to see that she behaves like any adult observing 5 times daily prayers, fasting and other “IBAADAT”. And whenever, a girl becomes an adult in the afternoon during the month of the RAMADAN, then she must start fasting in the remaining days of the month, but does not have to pay the past days before she became an adult in that month.

3. MENSTRUATION IN THE RAMADAN.

Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) said.

( "أليس إذا حاضت المرأة لم تصل ولم تصم ؟")

“Isn't it, when a (Woman) is in her menses she does not pray nor fast?”

A menstrual woman must not fast, nor pray at all. But she will pay the missed days in the RAMADAN but not the missing prayers. A menstrual woman and the one bleeding after childbirth are the same; the same rules apply to them. Whenever a menstrual woman finds that, she is no more bleeding there are 2 situations for her

1. If her cycle ends in the morning or day time, she cannot fast that day.

2. If she finds that she is clean or no more bleeding just before FAJRI prayers, she must quickly bath and start fasting from that day. Failure to do so will mean she is deliberately dodging fasting on that day. Which is HARAM on her. She can fast even she is not yet bath. Provided she is no more bleeding. The bathing can be done later.

5. VAGINAL ABNORMAL BLEEDING: what it is and what a woman should do in the RAMADAN?

In the Islamic studies we have something we called “DAMMUL ISTIHADA or دم الاستحا ضة” abnormal situation that occurs in some women, when vagina continue to discharge blood even when she is off menstrual period. When this happens to a woman in her usual menstruations circles, she should count her normal days which ranges between (3,5,or 7days) depending on the person, any additional day than her normal periods are considered abnormal that’s what we called ,
“DAMMUL ISTIHADA” or دم الاستحا ضة”)

Continue abnormal bleeding does not prevent a woman from fasting. She should bath in that condition and start praying and fasting. That is not a menstruations blood and must not prevent her from any “IBADAT” even to circumambulate or go around the KA’ABAH.

6. PREGNANCY AND THE MENSTRUATION PAINS AND SIGNS.

Whenever a pregnant woman sees blood coming from her vagina and she is fasting, she should continue with her fasting because that’s not a menstruation. But when a woman start to get her labor pangs or pains during pregnancy, or menstruations pains and there is no blood coming out from her till sun sets on that day, then her fasting is perfect and she must not repay that day.

A pregnant woman and a nursing mother, whenever they are not comfortable either because of their baby or themselves, they can stop fasting and pay those days later. No “KAFFARAT or ransom on them. But other scholars say that, a pregnant woman and a nursing money can stop fast and will not even pay for the days they missed. And they based their “Fatwa” on Hadith of RASULULLAH that says:

(قال نبي الله صلى الله عليه وسلم:« إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَعَالَى وَضَعَ عَنْ الْمُسَافِرِ الصَّوْمَ وَشَطْرَ الصَّلَاةِ، وَعَنْ الْحَامِلِ أَوْ الْمُرْضِعِ الصَّوْمَ» [أخرجه أهل السنن إلا أبا داود]، فإذا وضع الله ذلك فليس لأحد أن يلزمهما به قضاءً إلا بدليل.

ALLAH swt, has relieved fasting on the traveler and has permitted him to pray half of any SALAT on the road until he reaches his destination. The last part of the Hadith says:

وَعَنْ الْحَامِلِ أَوْ الْمُرْضِعِ الصَّوْمَ»
And ALLAH has relieved fasting on the pregnant and nursing mother.

That’s why some knowledgeable men from the Companions of RASULULLAH like (Ibn Umar and Ibn Abbass ) said, the pregnant and nursing mother can break their fasting and do not have to pay the missing days, because RASULULLAH said that. But she must feed the poor for each day she misses.

قال ابن عمر رضي الله عنه:"الحامل والمرضع تفطر ولا تقضي" [الدارقطني]، وقال:"تطعم مكان كل يوم مسكيناً[البيهقي]، وبذالك أفتى ابن عباس [أخرجه البيهقي]، ودين الله يسر.

What most scholars say is, the pregnant and nursing mother will pay the missing days and not “Kaffarat” on them.

Are You A Traveler? Learn How And When To Shorten Solat!

* Shortening Salat when travelling is sunnatu mu-akkadah (Emphasised Sunnah), even if no difficulty is encountered. 4:101, al-Nasaa’i, 1420; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Nasaa’I, al-Nasaa’i, 2275; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Nasaa’i. Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah, 8/127, I’laam al-Musafireen bi Ba’d Aadab wa Ahkaam al-Safar wa ma yakhuss al-Mallaheen al-Jawwiyyeen by Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen, p. 13

* Shortening Salat mean observing four rak’ats Salat (like Zuhr, ‘Asr and ‘Isha) as two rak’ats. Sahih fiqhi sunnah, Jami’u liahkami fiqhi sunnah.

* Some scholars set a distance for a travel before Salat can be shortened to be four ‘Burud’ (16 farsakh/48 miles/83km) while the most evidenced is to shorten Salat whenever it is referred to as travel in language and practice and it requires preparation of provision for travel. Q4:101-102: Al-Tirmidhi, hadith 2960, Al-Tirmidhi, hadith 453, al-Mughni (2/65), Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (8/99)

* According to some jurists, if you know that you are going to stay in a place for more than four days, you will not do ‘qasr’ but if you are going to stay there for less than four days or you don’t know when you will finish the task, then you will continue with the ‘qasr’ while some concluded that in as much you are living like a traveller (not like inhabitant), shortening of Salat continues. The reason for the differences is that there is no definitive evidence that would dispel confusion, hence, the views of the scholars differed. Al-Haafiz ibn Hajar said in his commentary on the hadeeth of al-‘Ala’ ibn al-Hadrami, according to which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Three days for the muhaajir after returning from Mina.” al-Bukhari, 3933 and Muslim, 1352, Al-Sharh al-Mumti’, 4/545, al-Majmoo’, 3/171; Bidaayat al-Mujtahid, 1/168. What this hadith refers to is that staying Makkah was forbidden to one who had migrated therefrom before the Conquest, but it was permitted to those who went there for Hajj or ‘Umrah to stay after completing the rituals (of Hajj or ‘Umrah) for three days and no more. It was understood from this that if a person stays for three days, the rulings on travelers still apply to him. Fath al-Baari, 7/267.

In summary, these three categories of travelers will observe Salat qasr: A traveler that is proceeding without staying on the journey route; a traveler that does not intend to stay but expects accomplishment of a need; and a traveler that travels to a city but does not have the intention of such stay that will make him not to be on journey (like NYSC orientation camp). However, a traveler that travels to a city other than his own city but intends to stay there, such stay that will make him not to be on journey, will not observe Salat qasr. Sahih fiqhi sunnah, Jami’u liahkami fiqhi sunnah.

* Travellers need to attend Jumu’ah and Eid Salat. Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah, 11/140-142

* It is permissible for a traveller to join two Salats (Zuhur and Asr, Magrib and Ishah), wiping over socks for three days and shortening prayers, and not fasting during Ramadan. And it makes no difference whether he travels by land or by sea. Q4:101, al-Bukhari, 1090; Muslim, 685, al-Bukhari, 1081; Muslim, 693Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (8/109, Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (8/155), Majmoo Fataawa wa Maqaalaat Mutanawwi’iah li’l-Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (12/297). Al-Sharh al-Mumti’, 4/514, Muslim, 705, Majmoo’ al-Fataawa, 22/293.

* It is permissible for traveler to join two prayers whilst thinking it most likely that he will reach his city before the end of the time for the second one. Liqaa’aat al-Baab il-Maftooh (1/203).

* If the traveler is in a city or town other than his own, he has to attend prayers in congregation in the mosque if he hears the call to prayer. Q4:102, al-Bukhari, 618; Muslim, 651, al-Bukhari, 626; Muslim, 651, al-Tirmidhi, 217; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Rasaa’il al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, 15/252, Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Rasaa’il al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, 15/422, Al-Awsat, 4/135, Al-Salaah wa Hukm Taarikiha, p. 137, 138, Q2:43, Q3:43 Q9:119, al-Salaah wa Hukm Taarikiha, 139-141, Al-Awsat, 4/134, Subul al-Salaam, 2/18, 19, Abu Dawood (552) and Ibn Maajah (792), Al-Majmoo’, 4/164, Al-Awsat, 4/134, Al-Mughni, 2/3, Muslim, 654, Al-Salaah wa Hukm Taarikiha, p. 146, 147, Al-Salaah wa Hukm Taarikiha, p/ 153

* If a traveler prays with an imam he should pray four rak’ats, whether he catches up with the prayer from the beginning or he misses part of it. Q4:102. Al-Bukhari 636, Muslim 602, Muslim 688, Ahmad 1865.

* If the traveler catches up with the imam in less than a rak’ah, he should pray the prayer in shortened form. For example: the traveler catches up with the imam in the final tashahhud of the Zuhr prayer. In that case he should pray Zuhr as two rak’ahs. This is how he should pray if he did not catch up with one rak’ah or more. Saheeh Muslim (688), Saheeh Muslim (694).

* A traveler that prays ‘Isha behind a resident who is praying Tarawih, after observing two rak’ats with Imam he/she should say the salaam with the imam, because then he has followed the Sunnah by shortening his prayer, and he has not gone differ from the imam, because the imam prayed two rak’ahs. Liqa’ al-Baab il-Maftooh (30/117).

* Nafilah before or after Zuhur, Asr, Mogrib and ‘Ishai may not need to be offered by travellers but it is sunnah to offer others like witr, sunnah of fajr, qiyamu layl, Q33:21, Q51:17, Saheeh Sunan Abi Dawood, 1269, al-Bukhari, 1000, al-Bukhaari, 1098, al-Bukhari, 400, al-Bukhari, 357. Al-Bukhari, 1673, Muslim, 1218, Zaad al-Ma’aad, 1/473, Zaad al-Ma’aad, 1/315, Muslim, 681, Kitaab Salaat al-Musaafireen wa qasriha (The prayer of travelers and shortening the prayer) (no. 724), Zaad al-Ma’aad, 1/316.

* Praying Tarawih is mustahabb for the traveller as for the non-traveler. Zaad al-Ma’aad (1/311), Al-Bukhari (945) Saheeh (1112) Q33:21, Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (7/206)

* If you are living in a city working from Monday to Friday and travel back home by weekends, you will not do ‘qasr’ while in the cities (home and working place) except if you are on the road in between, then, you can shorten salat. Liqaa’aat al-Baab al-Maftooh (1/294), Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah, 8/148.

* A woman should not travel except with a mahram, even if it is a short trip. Al-Bukhaari (1729) and Muslim (2391), Fath al-Baari (4/76), Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (17/339, Tuhfat al-Muhtaaj (2/370) and al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah (27/270).

His Wife is not very interested in Intercourse so he Resorts to Masturbation

Questions:

I am a man of a strong desire. I like to have intercourse everyday. When I try to start it with my wife, she refuses for weak reasons like saying she is tired or lazy to make ghusl or because she wants to delay it to next day. So I have intercourse with her only twice a week. I cannot be patient. So I have to masturbate by my hand fearing to fall into adultery. Although I know it is haram, I masturbate about three times a week while my wife is beside me and she knows what I am doing. My wife cares a lot about beautifying herself and using perfumes, but she becomes annoyed if I ask her for sex. Am I sinful to masturbate by my hand? If yes, then does my wife share in this sin

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

The husband has to treat his wife kindly, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“and live with them honourably”

[al-Nisa’ 4:19] 

Part of living with one’s spouse honourably is having intercourse, which is obligatory upon the husband, as much as is sufficient to satisfy her, so long as it does not harm him physically or distract him from earning a living.

The wife is obliged to obey her husband if he calls her to his bed, and if she refuses then she is sinning, because of the report narrated by al-Bukhaari (32370 and Muslim (1436) from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him), that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a man calls his wife to his bed and she does not come to him, and he goes to sleep angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning.”

Shaykh al-Islam [Ibn Taymiyah] (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: She has to obey him if he calls her to his bed, and this is a duty that is obligatory upon her. … If she refuses to respond to his call, then she is being disobedient and wilfully defiant. … as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“As to those women on whose part you see ill‑conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance”

[al-Nisa’ 4:34] 

End quote from al-Fataawa al-Kubra (3/145, 146).

But it is not permissible for the husband to force his wife to do that for which she is not able with regard to intercourse. If she has an excuse because she is sick or she cannot bear it, then she is not sinning if she refuses to have intercourse.

Ibn Hazm (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Both slave women and free women are enjoined not to refuse the master or husband if he calls them for intercourse, so long as the woman who is called is not menstruating or sick and likely to be harmed by intercourse, or observing an obligatory fast. If she refuses with no excuse then she is cursed. End quote from al-Muhalla (10/40).

Al-Bahooti (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

The husband has the right to enjoy his wife at any time, so long as that does not keep her from performing obligatory duties or harm her; he does not have the right to enjoy her in that case, because that is not part of living with them honourably. But if it does not distract her from that or cause her harm, then he has the right to enjoyment. End quote from Kashshaaf al-Qinaa’ (5/189).

The wife whose husband is harming her by having intercourse too often may come to some agreement with her husband concerning a specific number that she can put up with, and if he does more to such an extent that it is harmful to her, then she has the right to refer the matter to the qaadi (judge), who may determine a specific number and oblige both husband and wife to adhere to that.

Secondly: 

There is no sin if the husband is masturbated by his wife’s hand, because it is permissible for him to enjoy her; the same applies if he ejaculates outside the vagina, because of the general meaning of the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts)

6.Except from their wives or (the slaves) that their right hands possess, __ for then, they are free from blame”

[al-Mu’minoon 23:5,6].  

If the wife will be harmed by intercourse, she will not be harmed if her husband enjoys her in other ways, so she has to allow him to do that.

Both spouses have to tackle this problem in a kind, loving and frank manner; and each of them should understand the rights and duties that they have, because most marital problems stem from ignorance of that.

Some husbands are keen to satisfy their own desires, and they hasten to do that without caring about their wives or paying attention to their right to pleasure, so the wife finds no enjoyment in it and is put off by it, and it becomes a problem and a burden for her.

Hence we say: Strive to create love and affection between you and your wife; pay attention to her situation and understand her feelings; avoid that which will harm her or hurt her. Tell her of the shar’i ruling concerning this issue and help her to follow it, and do not put her off, and be moderate in your approach, and you will get what you want.

May Allaah help us and you to obey Him and seek His pleasure.

And Allaah knows best.

My Husband Is Physically Unable to Sexually Satisfy Me. What Should I Do ?

I have been married for a decade, my husband is physically unable to sexually satisfy me, and he does not want to seek medical advice. He also doesn’t practice. What should I do

Answer:

Assalamualaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,

I pray this finds you well. May Allah reward you for seeking out clarity on this sensitive and important issue.

Erectile Dysfunction

Dear sister, your husband’s inability to sexually satisfy you is treatable, but only if he is willing to seek help. This sexual difficulty can actually point to other health issues.



Sexual frustration

This is a serious issue, as being unable to sexually satisfy one’s wife is legitimate grounds for divorce. I pray that Allah softens your husband’s heart, and helps him satisfy you through seeking medical help.

If you are sexually frustrated to the point of fearing falling into zina, then it is permissible for you to masturbate. However, that is a last resort. It is praiseworthy for you to use other methods of controlling desire, such as fasting, reducing/eliminating meat intake, avoiding media that can inflame the senses etc. Allah knows how difficult this is for you.

Prayer of Guidance

I encourage you to perform the Prayer of Guidance up til seven times to help you decide how to move forward. Marriage is a a contract which permits lawful intercourse between a husband and a wife. If this is not happening for you, then you need to have an open and honest discussion with your husband about how you are not satisfied with your marriage. Part of loving one’s spouse is wanting to please them in ways which are important to them. Wanting to be sexually satisfied is a reasonable, healthy and important expectation within marriage. Please see a culturally-sensitive marriage counsellor so you can get some professional help in resolving this issue.

Children

Do you and your husband want to have children? Addressing his health issue is a critical step in wanting to have kids someday.

Non-practising husband

May Allah reward you for making dua for your husband and encouraging him to good. I encourage you to perform the Prayer of Need regularly, in the last third of the night, and beg Allah for help. Never underestimate the power of dua.

Set a good example by being someone who actively worships Allah in all that you do. Treat him with compassion, patience, and make dua for improvement in his character as well as yours. Be of service in other ways too, and encourage him to do the same e.g. soup kitchens, visiting the sick etc.

Reward

“What is with you passes away and what is with Allah is enduring; and We will most certainly give to those who are patient their reward for the best of what they did.” [Qur’an, 16:96]

Allah alone knows the tremendous reward you are earning for being patient with your husband. At the same time, please be honest with yourself. Is this a life you are truly content living? If you want change, such as the ability to experience marital intimacy or the joy of a spouse you can worship Allah with, then you must do your best to get him on board. If he resists and does not want to be part of the solution, then please ask yourself if you’ll be happy going on like this indefinitely. I pray that Allah grants you clarity on this issue, and guides you to what is most pleasing to Him.

The Power of Tahajjud

I am writing this because I want to share with you my story of how we experienced the power of Dua, Ajwa Dates, Tahajjud and most importantly Tawakkul.

My wife and I were blessed with a beautiful baby girl three years ago, Alhumdulillah. She was born in 7 and 1/2 months, yes, pre-mature. Looking nothing less than a baby monkey with hair all over her body, she was a beautiful blessing sent down to us from Allah SWT.

My baby spent 53 days in NICU and those were the most difficult days of my life but Alhumdulillah that passed.

Now because my daughter was pre-mature she had some birth defects like weakness, delayed speech and delayed walking. We were doing check-ups regularly with the paediatrician.

Slowly but surely weakness was turning in to strength. Delayed speech was replaced with constant call to “Baba come here” “Baba catch me” and many more BUT delayed walking seemed the most serious.

Around a year and a half ago, back her physiotherapist asked us to get her hip checked by a specialist and what we learned was not something we expected.

My little girl was diagnosed with DDH (Development Hip Dysplasia). Her left hip joint was not forming. She had to go through a minor surgery. This will be her 2nd surgery at such a tiny age. First surgery for hernia, was when she was 2 months old.

So the DDH surgery took place, she was in a cast for 3-4 months. We were literally under house arrest, could barely take her out, though we did.

A few months after the cast were removed she started walking though not with full confidence and control but at least she started. We had to go for check-ups every 3 months, while getting x-rays done to know the bone position and development was a must.

Fast-forward to February this year, we received another shocking news that her left leg which already has a surgery MIGHT need another one as although the bone had developed and she was walking (not running or jumping yet), the hip bone was not fixed in the socket 100%. It was not dislocated but the condition is called Sub-Luxation.

We felt as if we were hit by a bullet train out of nowhere. First the thought of my little one having to undergo another major surgery and secondly the finances to pay for the surgery. I had no idea what to do. I was lost.

The doctor recommended to keep my little one in leg brace during the night to help keep the bone directed towards the socket. We checked online to learn about children and parents who have already gone through this. We also went to another doctor for a “second opinion” and he confirmed the need for surgery.

Devastated and frightened, our only hope was in  Allah swt. It’s not that this door was the last, we have always prayed for our child’s health.Although my wife and I did not pray regularly, this shocking incident broke us down and brought us down on our knees to beseech to Allah. Thankfully our head bows down and our hand raises for help to the Ahad, Allah swt.

We started praying 5 times, I would make up for any prayers missed. I bought Ajwa dates for it has benefits (increases bone strength) and recommended by our Prophet peace be upon him. After every prayer I would call my little one, read Ayat-al-Kursi and Surah Fatiha and blow on her left hip joint. My wife and I also started praying Tahajjud. For Dua made at Tahajjud is like an arrow which does not miss its target – Imam ash-Shafi.

I felt at peace after praying Tahajjud. I asked Allah to help my child, give her strength and to put her bone back in to the socket. Yes why not, after all He is the Al-Qadir, the All Powerful. And I also prayed to guide me towards a decision that would be best for my child and to give me strength and patience to go through the surgery with her. And we left everything to Allah, knowing and believing completely that He will get me, my wife and my child through this just like He did when my little one was in hospital for 53 days away from us.

Today, 2nd May 2016 , three months after we first learnt of her hip bone condition, we went to see the doctor again hoping or may be not hoping for any miracle and preparing for the worse, we got the routine x-ray done.

So now we are in doctor’s room, my wife takes out the x-ray while the doctor is busy on a call. She puts up the x-ray near the light and at first the bone looks to be in the same position as it was 3 months back. Then for no reason why she takes out the x-ray taken 3 months back AND we can see some improvement in the joint!!!

I looked at my wife with a big question mark and waited for doctor to examine the latest x-ray and compare with the last one.
And here comes the surprise. We came in prepared for the worse but it all changed when the doctor started talking and explaining the change. Alhumdulillah. My tension changed to tears of relief and joy.

The doctor says the bone looks stable, although very slightly out of the joint but he does not see the need for surgery now and recommends us to see a physiotherapist for some back/hip strengthening exercise along with keeping the night time leg brace. In the doctor’s opinion with the help of exercise the bone will get its strength and move itself into the socket.

In the doctor’s room, in the hospital, driving while coming back home I literally had to hold my tears rolling out. I thanked Allah swt for helping my baby but I cannot thank Him enough ever.

I don’t know whose dua was accepted because my parents made dua for us as well. More importantly, this episode taught me the importance of Tahhajjud and Tawakkul.

I intend to make Tahhajjud a way of life and pray it regularly and not only when needed of course along with the obligatory 5 time prayers and I have also learned the power of Tawakkul.

I am still trying hard to control my tears, but I know it will all pour out tonight when I put my head down in front of the One and Only when the people around me would be sleeping, Tahhajjud. Alhamdulillah.

21 Best Islamic Apps of 2017 that Every Muslim Should Have!!!

MD. Mominul Shishir • June 1, 2017 • No Comments

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Undoubtedly, smartphone penetration is increasing significantly in emerging economies. Countries in the Far East such as Malaysia & Indonesia have experienced a significant rise in penetration. There have been numerous apps that are catering to the Muslim Market in Muslim Majority Countries. Now we’re going to look at the top 21 Islamic apps that have taken the Muslim world by storm.

From Salah timing to halal dining these are 2017’s top apps to make daily life even better.

21. Halal Trip

This is the one-stop app for planning all your halal travel needs. From purchasing tour package, downloading city guides, finding halal food, finding nearby mosques and attractions, Halal Trip helps you plan your entire trip.

Download Now From Google Play

20. Halal Gems

Halal Gems, launched in 2015 in an app, digital magazine, and website that showcases the best halal cuisine and halal restaurants from throughout the world. This app is a must have for the food junkie.

Download Now From Google Play

19. MuzMatch

With over 145,000 global members and 3000 successful marriages, the London based company MuzMatch has built a Islamic app based platform to connect Muslim singles around the world. You never know if you might just find the Mr or Mrs Right just one continent away. Insha’Allah.

Download Now From Google Play

18. Islamic GPS

Founded in London, this Islamic app is one that allow you to “see” awe inspiring Islamic heritage sights all over the globe. In order to “experience” the view, all you have to do is hold up your phone and turn around whichever way you want and suddenly you’ve transported to that place itself. Talk about cool.

Download Now From Google Play

17. Modanisa

Modanisa founded by Kerim Ture has quickly grown his company Modanisa into the largest modest fashion company in the world. Their Islamic app provides a great shopping experience in six different languages, making them one of the first truly global Muslim brands.

With 30,00 products across more than 300 brands you can discover all styles of abayas, tunics, nightwear, sportswear, scarves, coats, shoes and accessories and more from international designers.

Download Now From Google Play

16. Hadith Collection

Hadith Collection for Android is an ultimate collection of Hadith of Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him). The Islamic app contains Arabic mattan and translations in different languages of most accepted and authentic hadith books including Sahih Bukhari, Sahih Muslim, Sunan Abu Dawud and Malik’s Muwatta. It is very easy to use the application.

Download Now From Google Play

15. Ramadan Legacy

Ramadan Legacy, founded in 2013 that is dedicated to connect and empower Muslim during the month of Ramadan. This is the go to Islamic app to stay on track of your Spiritual Ramadan Goals. You can track your fasts, prayers, how much Quran you read and view other’s progress for social motivation.

Download Now From Google Play

14. Zabihah

Next we have a Halal Food app known as Zabihah. This Islamic app even has a website known as Zabihah.com. All you need to do is download this app, take it out when you need to find a Halal eatery, shake your phone a couple of times and voila- a nearby restaurant serving Halal food.

Download Now From Google Play

13. Quran Companion

The Islamic app Quran Companion is the smartest way to memorize Quran with features that are easy, fun & social. Perfect for every day, busy Muslim who desires an easier, more accessible way to build a Quran memorization habit in their daily life. By this way they can achieve their memorization goals faster and easier.

Download Now From Google Play

12. Scan Halal

Up next is Scan Halal, another Islamic app dedicated to helping Muslims find Halal food. You need to do is scan the item of interest and see if they have got into their database. The app tells if the food is indeed Halal or doubtfully so or even if it’s best not to buy it. It even helps you out if you are a vegan or vegetarian.

Download Now From Google Play

11. Quran Majeed

Quran Majeed is one other Islamic app that helps users learn how to recite the Quran, known as one of the most popular apps for Quran recitation. This Islamic app has been growing its fan base since 2015. More than five hundred thousand people are known to favor this app and over one hundred and eighty countries recite the Quran using this app. Truly a fan favorite.

Download Now From Google Play

10. Umrah & Hajj Guide

Umrah & Hajj Guide is an Islamic app that helps Muslims all over the world to know about every aspect of the performance of religious rituals of Umrah and Hajj in the most effective way. The Application comes up with 8 major Groupings which are- Umrah Guide, Hajj Guide, Ihram Instructions, Supplications, Hajj Map, Glossary, Miscellaneous, and Destination Map.

Download Now From Google Play

9. Quran English

Digital Quran/Koran with English translations, which has a word by word translation in English and audio mp3 murattal full Quran 114 Surah or 30 Juz without limitation. You can also use this Islamic app as an alarm for Azan. It has Hijri calendar too.

Download Now From Google Play

8. Eid SMS 2017

Do you have to send so many messages in the Eid occasion? Don’t worry about the typing and copy-paste anymore. Because Droid Digger came with this new Eid SMS 2017 Islamic app that will save your valuable time, energy as well as provide you a large collection of English, Bangla and Hindi Eid message via this small app.

Basically the home page of this app has three buttons for “English Eid SMS”, “Bangla Eid SMS”, and “Hindi Eid SMS”. You can easily choose a language of your choice and browse the collection of amazing Eid SMS to greet your friends and family members instantly.

Download Now From Google Play

7. Muslim Now

Muslim Now is the first Islamic community covering all Muslims daily needs with features like- displaying prayer time and next time to prayer, Quibla direction etc. Here is collection of Islamic YouTube videos like khawater. You can also find wonderful greeting cards with ability to write and share them through Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all other social media channels.

Download Now From Google Play

6. Ramadan Dua 2017

Ramadan is the month of good deeds and thus we get closer to Allah. We need some certain duas specially for Ramadan month which we usually do not keep in our mind. Ramadan Dua 2017, founded by Droid Digger in 2015 is an amazing Islamic app, where you can get all the necessary Ramadan duas in a single android app.

You can find almost all necessary Ramadan duas such as Suhoor dua, Iftar dua, dua for Lyalatul Qadr, dua for Salvation and many more. This app is like a digital book to guide you during Ramadan month.

Download Now From Google Play

5. MP3 Quran

MP3 Quran the most downloaded free audio Quran Islamic App on Market. The easiest ever for steaming. MP3 Quran support more than 15 languages.  In MP3 Quran application you can find more than 100 reciters for example- Maher Al Moekle, Ahmad Al Ajmy. Fares Abbad etc.

Download Now From Google Play

4. Digital Tasbih 2017

In this modern era as everything is getting digitized then why shouldn’t Tasbih. This simple Tasbih counter Islamic app will make your prayer easier and faster. No need to take your Tasbih while visiting mosque or other places, just taking your android smart phone is enough.

The Digital Tasbih Counter Islamic app is the modern and the digital version of Tasbih/Tashbeeh which can be used anytime and anywhere via your Android smart phone.

Download Now From Google Play

3. Dua & Azkar

Dua & Azkar is one of the most authentic ‘open source’ application available on Google Play. This is an Islamic app with many images and audios. It has more than one million downloads for its amazing features. The Application is very useful and fulfilling in all ramification. On the other hand, it is easy to use and practical.

Download Now From Google Play

2. Learn Quran

All in one app to study how to recite the Quran. With technology, learning how to recite the Quran is better, easier and faster than ever. This Islamic app suitable for learners at all levels: whether you don’t know at all how to recite the Quran, or you could recite but want to improve your tajweed and makhraj. Learn Quran is designed so that you can study with a teacher or by yourself. More than 900,000 people in more than 170 countries have used Learn Quran.

Download Now From Google Play

1. Muslim Pro

Lastly, every Muslim should have Muslim Pro Apps in their smart phones as this is the most sought after Islamic apps by many Muslims globally. Muslim Pro is the most downloaded and most reviewed Islamic apps in the world, with over 10 million downloads. By having this app, you can get accurate prayer time & Azan application. Quran with translation, qible locater, Islamic Hijri calendar, halal restaurant locater and many great features.

Download Now From Google Play

These 21 Islamic apps are a must have for any Muslim looking to enhance their Islamic spirituality, find their Muslim spouse, seamlessly finding the nearest halal restaurants and mosques, and much more. There’s a lot of movement in the space and it’s worthwhile to keep an eye out for this space.